Teenagers – sample IELTS essay

This is the next in my series of sample IELTS essays. This one is on the theme of the family and social problems caused by teenagers. In addition to the essay to download, I also give you some help with the language of cause and effect and impersonal essay vocabulary language.

The question and essay structure

In many countries there has been an increase in social problems involving teenagers in recent years. Many people believe that this is due to modern lifestyles because parents spend more and more time at work and have less time to supervise their children. To what extent do you believe this is true?

This is an essay question that can be dealt with in a variety of ways. If you decide the answer is “completely yes” or “completely no”, then you could have 2/3 content paragraphs explaining your arguments. I have chosen to use a “for and against” type structure and say that it is partly but not completely true. The benefit of this is that you normally had more to say.

The language of cause and effect

To essay this essay, you need to discuss cause and effect. This is some of the most important language you can learn for IELTS essays. It does help to use a variety of different words and structures. You can find some variations in my lesson on cause and effect vocabulary.

See the cause and effect language

There is no question that standards of behaviour have fallen among teenagers. The popular belief is that the principle cause is that parents are unable to supervise their children because they are away at work. There are, however, a number of other potential factors and in this essay I will examine what some of the reasons are.

It is undeniable that parents should bear some responsibility for the actions of their teenaged children. This is particularly true when they are absent from the home and not in a position to control their children. The argument is that if they were at home, then they would be able to make certain that their children did not join gangs and spent their time on socially acceptable activities.

However, it can also be said that working parents are in fact setting a good example to their children. Indeed, it is very often the case that teenagers who come from hardworking families spend their time on schoolwork and conduct themselves well. In fact, the teenagers who do create social problems by, for example, getting drunk or painting graffitti come from homes where parents are unemployed.

Other factors that lead to teenagers getting into trouble relate to the educational system.  This is due to the fact that many teenagers leave school aged 16 and do not find work because of lack of qualifications. As a result, they spend time on the street with nothing productive to do. Likewise, social problems  with teenagers can be the consequence of poor discipline at school with teachers failing to control their classes.

In conclusion, it is possible to say that this sort of problem is only sometimes the result of parents not supervising their children. It is equally possible to say that discipline in schools is at fault.

(299 words)

Impersonal language

If you are trying to make your essays more academic, it is also a good idea to try and use some impersonal language to give opinions. You can find some examples of this in my lesson on impersonal essay vocabulary. You are probably ring to use this language at the beginning of your sentences to help structure your writing.

See the impersonal vocabulary

There is no question that standards of behaviour have fallen among teenagers. The popular belief is that the principle cause is that parents are unable to supervise their children because they are away at work. There are, however, a number of other potential factors and in this essay I will examine what some of the reasons are.

It is undeniable that parents should bear some responsibility for the actions of their teenaged children. This is particularly true when they are absent from the home and not in a position to control their children. The argument is that if they were at home, then they would be able to make certain that their children did not join gangs and spent their time on socially acceptable activities.

However, it can also be said that working parents are in fact setting a good example to their children. Indeed, it is very often the case that teenagers who come from hardworking families spend their time on schoolwork and conduct themselves well. In fact, the teenagers who do create social problems by, for example, getting drunk or painting graffitti come from homes where parents are unemployed.

Other factors that lead to teenagers getting into trouble relate to the educational system.  This is due to the fact that many teenagers leave school aged 16 and do not find work because of lack of qualifications. As a result, they spend time on the street with nothing productive to do. Likewise, social problems  with teenagers can be the consequence of poor discipline at school with teachers failing to control their classes.

In conclusion, it is possible to say that this sort of problem is only sometimes the result of parents not supervising their children. It is equally possible to say that discipline in schools is at fault.

The essay to download

Teenagers - sample IELTS essay (11481)

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9 Responses to Teenagers – sample IELTS essay

  1. Reema August 23, 2011 at 1:10 pm #

    I like it ;)
    The Impersonal language is so useful. It would probably help me to improve my academic writing. Thank you.

  2. sumon September 8, 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    very good

  3. zalzal November 17, 2011 at 1:25 pm #

    I love this web site and composition of education programme. i will expect enjoy my English study. thank you all about~~

  4. Hebecah April 18, 2012 at 11:18 pm #

    Hi Dominic,

    Honestly, I am amazed with the content of your website. I wish I had found out about it earlier.

    Even though my exam is taking place this coming Saturday, I strong believe that I can benefit from it.

    Your lessons are much appreciated.

    Kind regards,
    Hebecah

  5. mz August 12, 2012 at 6:06 am #

    hi dominic and every body, i would appreciate any feed back. thanks
    It is true that the antisocial behaviour among young people has become more common in some countries.However, while i accept that busy working parents are playing a major role in causing this problem, i would also argue that there are other factors which are equally responsible for this phenomenon.

    On the one hand, our busy lifestyle is primarily responsible for many social issues among youngsters. Many parents choose to work longer hours in order to be able to meet the rising in living expenses.Also,women who traditionally used to stay at home and takecare of her children now in most cases had to work side by side with men .As aresult of this changes parents tend to be less close to their young children and less involved in their life.In some cases children`s guardian have no idea how there children spend there time and who they chatting to.For example,many teenagers might drop out of school without knowledge of their parents.

    On the other hand, i also believe that there are two principal factors are contributing to this proplem.Fristly,friends have become the major influence on our children `s behaviour because they spend most of the time with them.For instance they could possibly end up taking illigal drug just because of beer pressure. Secondly, the mass media is playing an extremely serious role by sending wronge messages to teenegers` mind . They are showing violence and excessive alchole drinking as some thing desirable and to be copied.

    In conclusion, while there are grounds to argue that parents are mainly responsible for their children`s social issues , i would also say that mass media and friends are equally contributing to this problem.

  6. Jack March 6, 2013 at 9:52 am #

    Its really helpful. Examinees are encouraged to look at the materials.

  7. Anonymous March 29, 2013 at 9:11 pm #

    itz gud for attain knowledge

  8. Majid April 9, 2013 at 11:50 am #

    I recently found this site and i think it can be useful to enhance my writing skills but usage of impersonal essay vocabulary makes me rather uncomfortable duo to the fact that once you make any generalization then it is necessary to provide more reasons and scenarios to prove the point if you don’t want your argument to vanish into a thin air . Another thing that is not related to this topic but i find scary is the fact that i am so used to computer spell check and if the test is on paper then i will get tons of spelling errors , what can i do about it

    • Avatar of Dominic Cole
      Dominic Cole April 9, 2013 at 5:10 pm #

      Two good points.

      The spelling thing first. It does matter – curiously more in listening than writing in a way. One or two spelling mistakes in listening change easily change youer band score, whereas that is unlikely to happen in writing as it is just one part of vocabulary. If you do have a problem with spelling, spellcheck is a good way to work on it. But as you say, you do need to learn to write on paper!

      What you say about impersonal vocab and reasons and examples is a great insight. All I would add is that the question tells you to add reasons and examples – so that is a good thing, no?

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